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Monday, December 26, 2011

Untitled

This blog is a jumbled mess. its about the death of my dad and just me venting to get it all out. Just read it if you want to.

On Thursday, December 22, 2011, at 12:40 a.m., my dad died due to cancer. Last month, the doctors said he had only 4 - 6 months left to live. It started in his colon, and after surgery it spread. Chemo took care of it in his liver and kidneys, but after that it went to his spine. He underwent radiation treatment but that was taking too much of a toll on his body so he took himself off. If he had stayed on radiation, it would have only prolonged the time to possibly a few months.
At this point my family is pretty shaken up by it, we're trying to cope, yet we seem to be walking on egg shells. Tomorrow is his funeral. As of writing this, I will burying my dad in 11 hours.

My dad was never one to openly cry, and sometimes it seemed the only expression he could muster was anger or disappointment. I suppose it comes from his dad but I wouldn't know seeing as how I've never met either of my grandfathers. My dad's always been demanding, always tried to insist he was right all the time. He was hard-headed, he knew a lot but he didn't know it all.
He worked at a grocery store and the highlight of his day was seeing some of his customers. He would always talk about what customer did what, who said what, and would always bring conversations back to them. I regret telling him to stop talking about them. Sometimes he would dominate and conversation by going on and on about someone. I didn't think of it then, but from what his co-workers tell me he did the same about us to his customers. He would always speak so highly of us but at home he was a different person.
He had a dark side to him. We all do. But his was an unspoken family secret. I don't want to go into details but just know that it put a shadow over our lives for a very long time.

On Tuesday, December 12, my pastor convinced him to go into hospice. He knew he wasn't going to get out alive so he asked to talk to whoever he could. When he wanted to speak to me he FINALLY told me he loved me and he apologized for the way he had acted for so long. It was a 12 or 13 year old burden lifted off of my shoulders. I felt lighter for a few days until I learned that he had gone downhill. When I last saw him alive, he was skin and bones. He hadn't eaten anything because he couldn't swallow. He could barely see who was in front of him and I'm not sure he knew I was there. The last words I said to him were "I'll see you later, I love you."
I'm glad I got the chance to say that. I wouldn't be seeing him later but I just hope he understood that I do love him.

The night he passed, my family sat in the room at the hospice and just took it all in. He was really skin and bones then. He looked like a mummy. He had no muscles left. After seeing him like that, I'm not sure what killed him: the cancer, the medications making him unable to operate, or the lack of nutrients his body needed.

Soon my brother and I will have to step up and start helping my mom, not only supporting her emotionally but with paying bills. The three of us might need to get second jobs but I don't want to spend the rest of my life paying off old bills. I'm uncertain about the future, like I always am. But this time I can honestly say that I have no idea what to expect. I will try my damnedest to make it.

I don't want to be like my dad. I don't want to always be right. I don't want to lord over my home. I want a relationship with my wife, I want to lead my family with her by my side. I want to make decisions with her. I want to hold my wife and tell her I love her. I want to tell my kids I love them. I want to be the best dad ever. It takes effort and not just putting food on the table. Being there is what its about. I want to teach my kids what I can while constantly learning about them.
I am a lot like my dad but I can only hope that I don't turn out to be like him.

I don't know if I should continue writing this eulogy or not. I don't know whether to present it or not. On one hand I don't know what to say. Some people say write I feel. But I've never been good at expressing that. I guess its time I start.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Video: Mayer Hawthorne - Dreaming

I'm following the Rock-afire Explosion on Facebook and they posted this music video from artist Mayer Hawthorne. I've never heard of him but after watching the video he seems pretty good. Very mellow. But this post isn't about him, its about the animatrocities in the video. 
Sit back, relax, grab some pizza, and prepare to get freaked out once again.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Charlie Chaplin's Greatest Speech

For a man that made an entire career from being silent and comedic, he made one of the best and most heartfelt speeches ever recorded. I listen to this several times a week and it reminds me to stay humble, never be greedy, and most importantly to help others.


Sunday, July 10, 2011

I'm Suddenly An Anime Fan (A longer than normal post)

Hello.

My name is Garrett.

And I watch anime.

Yes, I'm sorry to admit it and I know it might disturb some people but, trust me, I'm not at the raving lunatic, cosplaying, japanese-phrase speaking, otaku level yet. I'm easing into a spot where I can find out what I like and what I don't like. Modern American cartoons these days seem to lack focus and are just bright colors and loud distractions for little kids.
I've been looking for and watching anime series online (I'm sorry. I'm broke. I can't afford to go out and buy tons of DVDs) and so far only a few have impressed me. I'm staying away from anything Dragonball, Naruto, Bleach, Deathnote, and Yu-gay-ho related. Basically anything that has been touched by 4Kids Entertainment, Shonen Jump, and anything overplayed by Adult Swim is pretty much off of my viewing list.
I'm trying to find and watch dubbed episodes. I know that's blasphemous to some but I can't read and watch what's going on at the same time without pausing every few seconds. That doesn't mean the argument about it is closed. School Days was subbed and I watched that.
I seem to watch a lot of comedies, sci-fi, and what some would call "girl's cartoons." Don't laugh at that, usually they have better-written stories, more fleshed-out characters, and better animation. There are a few action shows that I like to see, but for the most part they seem to be focused on superpowers and showing as much skin on a cartoon woman as allowable.

School Rumble, Love Hina, Elfen Lied, K-On, The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, and Tenjo Tenge are so far a few of the ones I've watched and really liked.
I used to watch anime in the past and for a while the only things I stuck to and swore by were Sailor Moon and Serial Experiments Lain. Back in middle school, I admit, I was into DBZ until one day I just realized how awful it really is: two men staring at each other, panting, thinking, panting, waiting, panting, staring, panting... for 30 minutes!

I'm half-hearted writing these as reviews on some of the shows that have interested me so far. I'm sure there will be others, and I'm sure there will be bothers. Like I said: I'm finding out what I like and what I don't. For starters, a show needs to have a good premise to it. If it sounds like several other descriptions that I've read then I automatically pass on it.


I own the first disc of Serial Experiments Lain with the first four episodes. Back when I first heard about it, it perked my ears a little.The plot sounded great. But a few weeks ago I was able to find and watch the next three episodes and I really have to say: Whaaaaaaaaaaaa???!! I have no idea what's going on. Its not that there are so many different characters, the cast is usually stable, but its the jumping from the real world to the wired and back from scene to scene that gets confusing. Some of the characters have done a 180 personality switch in just one episode. But aside from the whole "screwing with your mind and not sticking to one point" plotline, it's a very moody show. It was done entirely on computer and the art is heavy with shadows most of the time. The main character, Lain, appears timid in some scenes and the next she's mouthing off to someone.
It leads the viewer on for a little while then drops them into an art motif of shadows and crowds of people just standing around. The story advances without the watcher even noticing it and by the time you realize its taken a step forward its the end of the episode.
POINT, PLEASE?!
Despite all of its many shortcomings, Serial Experiments Lain is perfect for the people who think the Matrix is real or for emo kids looking for God.


I sort of have a gripe with a few of the shows I've been watching. One in particular is School Rumble and (almost) EVERY. MALE. CHARACTER. They seem to have their minds set on winning the hearts of one of the girls, but then one of them overhears someone or sees the girl doing something with another character or has a stray thought for not seeing their heartthrob and suddenly they assume that she either hates their guts or is about to run off and marry a turtle or something. Its the assuming they do in EACH and EVERY episode that just sets me on edge. They act stupid sometimes to the point that they can't stop their imaginations from thinking the worst. They're not poorly written, some of them have some depth and seem pure in their reasons, but the often single-mindedness that each one has is what's wrong. Meanwhile the girls are well done with differing personalities and personal lives. Albeit some of their problems can't relate to real life its still interesting seeing how things mesh out. The ending to the series is a satisfying one but may not be one that the viewer was hoping for.
If you're into goofy lovefest high school drama cartoons with the ability to poke fun at itself on some occasions then its definitely worth watching.


Haibane Renmei (translated means Charcoal Feather Federation) is the most beautiful anime I've ever seen and so far my most favorite. A fantastically-written story, interesting characters, and a world that the viewer is thrown in to that has a fair amount of mystery to it make it an unforgettable show and worth picking up the DVD set for. The best way to explain the show's existence would be to read about it from Wikipedia.
The story follows Rakka, a newborn Haibane (people that resemble angels) and how she grows to accept her new but short life. Unable to remember who she once was and not allowed to go searching for answers, her new life follows through with questions, smiles, tears and a depth of writing that really make you feel for the characters.
It bothered me that the show never went as in-depth as my curiosity wanted it to go. Why do the charcoal feathers exist alongside normal humans? Is this the same earth or a version of heaven? Why is no one allowed outside the wall? Its these questions that kept me hooked from beginning to end and I won't spoil any of it because I WANT you to see it for yourself.


Love Hina is a romanticom that's mostly slapstick humor, quick storylines, misunderstandings, gropings, beatings, and personal crushes. Think Tenchi Muyo without the aliens.
Keitaro fails the entrance exam into Tokyo University (several times) and finds himself unable to return home to face his parents. After his grandmother leaves him in charge of a girl's dormitory, chaos ensues with personal spaces invaded, samurai girls swinging swords, jealousy around every corner, and even a giant turtle attack. Its another goofy lovefest where you never know where someone's heart will land. And if Keitaro doesn't keep his hands to himself his will land on the ground outside of his chest.
I recommend it for someone looking for something light-hearted but the humor might not be the cup of tea for some since most of it involves Keitaro getting whacked in one way or another.


*YARRR! THAR BE SPOILERS AHEAD*
School days is based on a game that's infamous for some either violent endings or pleasant ones depending on the player's choices. According to Wikipedia, the last episode almost caused a bit of an uproar. After watching a few episodes you assume that its just a romance story. It masquerades as a bright and colorful cartoon but about halfway through the series things take a bit of a turn into bi-polar territory. It boils over into a love triangle that the main male character, Makoto, stupidly sets himself up for; eventually involving more than just two girls and even an orgy at one point. Yeah, this one is definitely not for the kiddies.
Eventually, Kotonoha Katsura, Makoto's original love interest, snaaaaaps after being unable to handle the fact that Makoto doesn't love her anymore, to the point where she speaks on her phone to him even after the battery has died. Sekai Saionji, the friend that helps Makoto and Kotonoha become lovers, tries to help Makoto "practice" love-making. This takes a bad turn when she believes she gets pregnant by Makoto and "accidentally" shouts it in front of the whole class.
In all honesty, School Days just isn't that impressive of an anime. It focuses on the romances and lusts of Makoto without ever diving into the personalities or lives of the main characters. Its shallow and short on story and while it is admirable for 0verflow to stick to the romance plot it begs to be understood why Makoto jumped from girl to girl. What made him that way? Kotonoha talks about her family's yacht, is she rich? Just a lot of things unanswered. The ending is disappointing and flatout creepy. As far as anime cartoons go you can watch worse but you can definitely see a lot better.


For those of you looking for something a bit more dark and action-oriented, you can't go wrong with Witch Hunter Robin. The thing that impresses me the most about this series is the fluid animation, done by Sunrise, who also worked on Cowboy Bebop, a favorite anime of mine. Things like fire and water, character movement, and camera flow throughout an area all have a certain animation to them that Sunrise fans have called "Sunrise Smooth."
Robin is a craft user of fire who is sent to Japan to help the STN-J contain witches and solve murder mysteries left in their wakes. The storyline is well thought-out, the characters are quiet but what they do reveal of themselves in small moments is deep. The nighttime moments are dark with a certain anxiety vibe to them while the daytime sees the characters more relaxed (maybe because they're not afraid of being executed in broad daylight). Without trying to spoil too much, the ending to the series leaves it wide open for a 2nd season, but unfortunately that remains to be seen.
There's a miniscule amount of romance involved in it but its briefly mentioned. I can easily recommend it to any one looking for action balanced with story, and a bit of dabbling into the supernatural.


Gunslinger Girl is another beautifully animated show. It follows a group of young girls who have been adopted by the Italian government and given cybernetic implants to make them the most dangerous assassins.
What's supposed to be the basis of the show attempts to weigh the balance of the girl's training with their childlike innocence. They are transformed to be killing machines but mentally they are still little girls. It doesn't delve into this plotpoint as wholeheartedly as it could and it leaves a few gaps in the story. This makes it really hard to understand the girls since nothing of their past is ever explained, save for one of them who remembers. Its not a thought-provoking anime and I suppose its meant to be taken as is, but more could have been done with story and more character development could have taken place. I've heard that some backstory reveals happen in the second season but I haven't seen it yet. Regardless, I recommend everyone watch this because of the gorgeous scenery, smooth animations, action sequences, and the operatic soundtrack that fits perfectly with Italy. Who can be disappointed when a songstress sings a tune while bullets are being sprayed?


I would describe more but these are the only one's I've watched so far. I plan on catching up with other series such as Ghost In The Shell, Blood+, Chobits, Ergo Proxy, s-CRY-ed, Highschool of the Dead, Vampire Knight, Great Teacher Onizuka, Neon Genesis Evangelion, Noir, Rosario + Vampire, Outlaw Star, Pokemon (because I NEVER saw it through to the last episode), Wolf's Rain, Trigun, YuYu Hakusho (those three were on Adult Swim but were not overplayed), and Valkyria Chronicles....
Well it looks like I won't be running out of things to watch any time soon. Although since starting a job a couple of weeks ago, my time to relax has been belittled and filled with whatever games I can manage to fit in. I usually watch an episode or two while eating dinner so its been slow going as of late. I can definitely see why some people prefer anime to American cartoons. While Haibane Renmei will never be able to replace Swat Kats on my list of favorite cartoons, they're closely tied.

And with that, I leave you all once again. If you're not into anime I'm sure you can find some that are categorized into genres you like. Give them a try and find out that they're nothing like American cartoons.

(Also, I wrote this without even mentioning Avatar: The Last Airbender, save for this moment, because I know some otakus haaaaate that some people consider it anime. I know its not and you're welcome.)

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Ever Wonder What Happened To Danny Tamberelli?

You know, Danny Tamberelli.... Little Pete from the Adventures of Pete & Pete and All That?
Well it looks like the episode where he learns he to play the guitar has really stuck with him.
He's been in a band the past few years called Jounce. Have a listen:



The flat tone of Danny's vocals and how the lyrics are written, the way the guitars pick up in the chorus and calms back down for the verse; it reminds me of Polaris, the band that did the music for Pete & Pete. I can understand why seeing as how Danny learned from the lead singer for the purpose of that episode... or so I've heard.

Setting aside the fact that it's Danny Tamberelli singing, Jounce is one of the best indie alt rock bands I've ever heard. I sometimes get in the mood for mellow music and they have that perfect sound to them.

The one thing I'm not liking though is how some people's comments on YouTube complain about something to do with him being Little Pete. All they see is him. Jounce is the band, and Danny's not using his child star status to boost them into the limelight. If anything it seem they're trying to make it on their own and that's what I like about them. They're good musicians who make good music, and I hope this video has shed a little light on them and they're sound.




Oh and he's also doing ManBoobs Comedy. What? Don't give me that look....
Its some pretty funny sketch comedy and it gives the pathetic foolish... I mean, fans of Danny's acting/comedy a few good nods to let everyone know that he's not done in the comedy scene yet.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Limited Edition Ice Blue Game Boy Pocket



I wanted one of these sooooo bad when I was a kid. I instead got the generic silver color that everyone else had. Each time the commercial came on it taunted me. Sure I can find one on ebay these days, and as of writing this I see one for only $10, and I'm dying inside to have it. I already have a GBA SP and Super Game Boy, so why would I want a Pocket?
Just to say I have it! The collector in me wants it so bad.
Although from my memory I could have sworn it was the same as the silver Pocket just with a blue color to it. Guess I was wrong.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Sunday, March 13, 2011

The Rock-afire Explosion Documentary

or.... "Does Anyone Remember This From Before It Was Chuck E. Cheese?"

While browsing on RetroJunk.com, I read an article that mentioned the great birthday places of our youth. Places like McDonald's, Chuck. E. Cheese and Pizza Hut (Oddly enough, Burger King isn't mentioned). But while reading I started to remember the terrifying animatronic show of Showbiz Pizza that was/is...
I only went there maybe twice a year if I was lucky, and half the time the robots were broken and a disembodied voice would speak to the others. The one thing I primarily remember about this show was that it scared the bejeesus out of me. The creepy anthropomorphic robots on stage that sang daily, and specially for kids on their birthdays, would be the things I avoided to the point that I would leave if they tried to sing Happy Birthday to me.

Because THIS ISN'T NATURAL!

But I digress, majorly. After seeing the Rock-afire Explosion mentioned in the article above, I was curious if anyone else remembered this nightmare classic show from my childhood. A Google search quickly turned up something more than I expected:


It turns out that there is a documentary on this ole' band and it features a man from the city that's (literally) less than 5 miles from me: Chris Thrash from Phenix City. He's been so touched by them that he's bought and refurbished each member. More than likely he obtained the robots that performed in the Showbiz Pizza I went to as a kid here in Columbus. Its a small world after all. To the side of the video on the homepage is a tour date listed, which leads me to believe that he takes this band on the road for others to enjoy, and that is awesome.

Despite being a mental terror to me when I was young, I find it interesting that a documentary has been made about this. This is some hardcore geeky stuff, and I love it. I have yet to see it, but I want to. 
I also intend to make it known to people that this DVD exists, which is the purpose of this blog. And I hope I've done the job.

I'm no movie reviewer, in fact, on my other blog I've stated that I've stopped writing video game reviews due to lack of interest from the audience. But if I can get my hands on this documentary, rest assured I'll let you all know how it is. But don't wait to take my word for it, go buy it yourself and remember a piece of your childhood.